better not worse

interesting day... talked to kids today that weren't making the best choices... not horrible kick you out of school choices... just decisions they were better than... I always ask them "what could they have chosen differently?" ...usually they go on a blame rant... and then I say "ok, pretend you are right and they did all that, what could you have done differently that would have made the situation better?" ...eventually... eventually... remember I work with non-self-reflective pre-teens... eventually... they think of something they could have done differently... a moment they made a choice that made it worse not better.

in one of those conversations today, a kid finally said "I could have not yelled at them" ... I affirmed that yelling probably made it worse instead of better... victory is ours. progress.

one of the biggest marks of character... whether it is a kid or grown folk... is the ability to take ownership of your own contribution to the problem.

the story behind the moment

this time last year I had a dream in my heart... tonight I watched as our boys choir sang their hearts out ...and our Elite choir brought the house down - literally with talent like I have never seen at a junior high level.

... some who heard our boys choir would say they weren't near the quality of the girls... but those people don't know the backstory... don't know the students with disabilities up there pouring their heart into a very off key rendition of great Motown hits.... they don't know the cool part of putting a whole room of junior high boys together - without girls- and havong them sing... they don't know what they sounded like in the beginning. 

I am so proud... 

my delight is different... because I know the backstory...

how many things in life would we see differently... if we stopped to appreciate the story behind the moment.

who?

Found this crazy tip...  Always clear your browser's cookies before booking flights online or use your browser's incognito mode. Many airlines and travel web sites (such as Expedia, Kayak, etc.) track how many times you've visited their websites. In so doing, they provide different offers and deals depending on the user.

Track me? Wow. I mean I guess I knew that... kinda... but not really...

Today I had someone look at me mid-conversation and snottily say "I realize you have absolutely no idea what I do in a day, but..."  Thankfully my poker face has improved over the last 2 years... but my brain - at least the part not controlling my face -  was saying... "and you have no idea what my "normal" looks like pal".

Websites know all about every click we make... and the people around us have no idea...

But do we share ourselves? Do we listen or just wait to talk? Do we ask the people around us about their worlds?

I don't... I worry they don't want to talk... or they will misinterpret what I mean...  but I wish I knew "what that person does in a day"... not like a statistical web browser factoid... but in a connected empathetic "what are they dealing with" way.

I don't like that man. I must get to know him better. - Abraham Lincoln

can't sit down

day 2 of my work out decision revealed a new muscle... a muscle never known before... a muscle of which I am completely unsure its purpose... a muscle that now has my constant attention.

who knew there is a muscle at the very top of your inside thigh... which can throb with pain upon sitting... or standing???  I was not aware.

This muscle had done its job happily for years... why now? Well... the workout video included the following: me in a push-up like pose - stretching my leg way up in the air - and kicking my leg over my body flipping me over to my back to "make a table".

I looked more like a heap of mess than a table... but I must have needed that muscle to accomplish the flip... because now I am acutely aware of its existence.

...read a book a couple weeks back about strategically choosing experiences outside of your comfort zone to intentionally reach goals...  you won't know the stuff you're really made of... unless you try.

we have so much more in us than we think... abilities, passions, ideas... so much we don't even know is there.  yet.

so swing your leg high... throw it with abandon over your body... and... you just might find something you never knew you had.

where did you learn that?

recently had a ridiculous interaction with extended family... that is entirely explained by my former professor's wife's puppy.

She carefully examined each one... looking for the perfect coat... the sweetest disposition... the cutest tail. After 30 minutes or so, she happily paid the farmer and brought her baby beagle home.

the next morning there was a horrible crowing... she tried to clear her head... where could the noise be coming from? After some groggy investigation... her puppy was found cock-a-doodling.
See... he had been raised under a chicken coup... grew up listening to the sounds of the chickens... day after day... hearing the chickens and roosters... the puppy sounded like his environment. :)

we all sound like our environment. don't we? we talk like our friends. we argue like our parents. - we  do what we have seen patterned.

eventually her puppy stopped crowing... the new environment having it's impact.

the environments we choose... form our destiny... we decide... if we are going to learn to be who we were made to be... or continue to cluck.